Blood Relatives

Francis is a 115-year-old Yiddish vampire who still looks 35. He's been roaming the American backroads in his beat-up muscle car for decades, keeping to himself, and liking it that way. One day, he meets a feisty teenager who claims she's his daughter, and she has the fangs to prove it. They end up on the road together, trying to decide whether or not they want to sink their teeth into a more traditional family life… well, traditional as far as a father and daughter vampire pair could do, that is.

Wearing its heavy Near Dark influences clearly on its sleeve, Blood Relatives is a charming and funny little vampire road movie about fathers and daughters, about making room in your life for others, and how everyone has to grow up eventually and let go of their younger selves, even vampires, and most especially parents, whether they’re ready to or not.

The jokes don’t always land, it’s not really scary or gory, or really all that much of a vampire movie to be honest (despite that being the main subject matter), and it does meander a bit during its 90 minute-ish run time, but to be fair… it is a road movie, and honestly, this doesn’t really negatively impact the film all that much. Overall, this is an enjoyable ride-along with a pair of likable characters, who are just trying to find an equilibrium with their new lives together.

Noah Segan writes, directs, and stars as the good Jewish boy, longtime drifter, and vampire, Francis, who has been haunting the country’s backroads in an old muscle car for a long time, and he does a pretty good job of it all around. Decent. No re-inventing the wheel, but… not bad. The real star is Victoria Morales, playing the estranged half-vampire daughter, Jane. Victoria has an on-screen presence that makes me think we’ll see a lot more of her in the future.

Specifically, there’s two things I particularly liked about the film.

1. I like the way the film infers that vampires, werewolves, and possibly many other kinds of creatures of myth and legend, are all out there, living amongst us “normals” and just trying to fit in and get by.

I’m always a fan of that idea.

2. When given the choice, our vampire protagonists mostly just eat red hat MAGA bigots, most of whom are listening to a racist conspiracy Alex Jones/Joe Rogan/Rush Limbaugh kind of shitty talk radio program.

I am a big fan of that idea too.

Thumbs up. Definitely worth a watch.