The Grandmaster Of Kung Fu

Set in the early 20th century, with Japan occupying much of China, the national pride of both countries seems to hinge on whether or not Chinese kung fu is superior to Japanese martial arts, and the answer to this will be determined… by fighting.

If you’ve ever seen almost any of the more well-known Chinese Martial Arts Movies, then you’ll recognize the plot of this one straight-off, because Grandmaster of Kung Fu is yet another retelling of the Chinese Connection/Fists of Fury/Ip Man story but waaaaaay more melodramatic than usual, at least in my experience. Granted, this is partly due to the ridiculously straightforward subtitles, but it’s mostly because it’s also a pretty rote rendition of what’s a pretty cliché story at this point.

The kung fu is cool though.

The best part about this film is that it understands the assignment. “You’re here to see kung Fu. We’re here to show you kung Fu. So, let’s just get to it.”

And they do.

Which I appreciate.

A lesser, and probably unintended bonus is how unimaginative the subtitles are. There’s just no attempt at all here to adjust the dialogue. Zero effort. When the local Chinese Kung Fu masters see that the Japanese have opened a dojo, they rush in there just as mad as a sack of wet cats. The Japanese guys are waiting, because it’s all a trap to start a fight, and as soon as the Chinese rush in there, the Japanese immediately start strutting about and say (and I’m paraphrasing here, but not really): “Check this shit out,” and one of the Japanese bad guys tears a sheet away from an easel, revealing a sign with some writing on it, and goes: “Look, we made a sign for you guys, and it says… You guys suck.” Then he gives them a thumbs down, and the Chinese guys lose their shit. They’re just like “You motherfuckers… That’s all I can stand, and I can’t stand no more!” Immediate punching. Immediate. Everyone in the room is all in too. The sign apparently just says: “The Sick Men of East Asia.” That’s it. That’s what the subtitles say. There’s no attempt to convey why that is so upsetting to the Chinese guys, but boy howdy, is it ever. I guess the translators were just like “Fuck you, guys, that’s what it says. Shut up and watch.”

Again… I appreciate how the film understands the assignment.

Also, the very end? Fantastic. (Chef’s kiss) No notes.